My wise daughter told me that she likens trust to a rock. She gives a few away and if one is thrown back at her, she will think twice to give it back. Brilliant , I say. And very true. Then I thought to myself and looked back at my life and severely concluded that I have been “stoned to death”.

This overblown realization has led me in introspection and  really question where I base my faith and ability to trust. I may have been unable to get out of the way and be buried in the landslide of misgivings and disappointments but like the proverbial question of what came first “the chicken or the egg?” do I trust first or trust after the situation or person is worthy of the trust? And then, don't I really just distrust instead?

Call it pessimism if you will, but I just realized most of us are in a fault-finding mission of some sort and the  fatal wounds of disappointment and fractured existence are too real to ignore.

I concluded at one time that if I expect the least from those around me, I will never be disappointed but I am already disappointed and there's no need to raise my hopes. It becomes comical to a fault and Am I really saving my self from further disillusion?

But today, I walked out of my house and I cannot deny the renewed faith I have every time I see the sun shine or even the snow fall. I cannot forget the smiles of strangers who need the simplest affirmation of happiness. I cannot deny the words of love that I hear constantly over the phone from my family every time we hang up. I cannot ignore the impulsive glorious singing in the narrow hallways and bathrooms in my home. I watched the bursting colors as the day closes and marvel at the imposing mountains east of me. And I cannot close my eyes without a prayer of thanks that no matter my folly, trust and faith are two gifts I have with no recompense.

Yes, trust was given to me like a rock to keep me grounded and to keep me real. To help me understand that disappointment renews and redeems those who do not give up the inheritance of perfection and divine existence.

My wounds may be deep but they are healing. I will understand agony to gain courage. I will face disappointment to oblige second and third chances. I will welcome the crucial teachings of forgiveness for godly strength. And because I am mended I will keep gathering the rocks of faith along my way.

MY ROCKS OF FAITH

ZONE LEADERS!!!!

Micronesia Guam 

The letters are few and far between but the small droplets of news are so precious from this incredible young man who can not say enough about his missionary work. The other day we were surprised by a visit from two special friends who were Elder Malit's zone leader and an Assistant to the Mission President, both were very good friends of his. They gave us good news of how Elder Malit is just loving the people of Chuuk, gladly, more than he loves "SPAM" (which is mainstay in his island diet).

He is going to a year out in April and we know it is a bittersweet realization that all good things will and eventually, end. But when you do good and great things, all will extend to eternity.

He has been called a Zone leader since November and he is working hard and probably, panicking all the time that he is not doing enough. But, like he says, "how do you eat an elephant?" (not that you'll really eat one), ONE BITE AT A TIME!!! We love our Elder and we will still be anxious for the letters that literally comes by a boat! from his island to ours!

"GROUPS" of friends..

my husband, paulo, recently discovered facebook and the user friendly feature of creating "groups". he went amuck and with uninhibited dedication searched for his long time friends and acquaintances. i found him awake late nights and early morning hours to accommodate  different time zones  with friends on few parts of the world, skyping. yes, skype!! (i couldn't get him to open his own email at one time) and this computer illiterate novice is maximizing his keyboard time to unite friends from so many times and places.
its quite amazing and really, just fun!

places and faces can take us back to the best times when our lives meshed and twined. and in those segments we can find ourselves once again. our friendships truly define us. our friends make and unmake us. we keep those we seek and we seek those we want to keep. we cross boundaries of land and time. we make friends and we become one. we speak a certain language with inside jokes and rhetoric of sorts. we are bound because once in our lives we were touched simply by the hand of a friend.

have fun with the "groups" take only the best and forgive the least.

"the best of friends"